In reference to my twerk post, I’m also about as gangsta as Taylor. But I think this is totally amazing.
Subtitles in English and Spanish.
For all, LIKE ME, who had no idea how to twerk. Taken from The New York Post, so it’s legit.
3 years later, I finally have my life together. It’s crazy to think about the person I was and how awful I felt then versus where my life has led me. I just needed to write this so that whomever still reads here can see that it can take a long time, but life moves on. You just have to live your life and move with it. It doesn’t always mean that you’ll get what you want at that moment, and when you look back, those things might not even be what you really want. When you get into your 20s, your life vastly changes. Every year I look back to the previous year and I’m shocked.
I’m now moving out on my own, back in college, working a job I love, dating a wonderful person and have a group of supportive friends and family. But it took me a good three years to get myself on track.
3 years ago I thought I’d never love again. I thought my whole life ended. I just tried to fill the gaps in my life. You just learn that you need to just go with it. There are 6 billion people in the world. You will survive. You will meet new loves and friends. You can get a new job. You can go back to school. You’ll make life choices. You can make things right.
But no matter what, you can turn it around and you can be okay. It just might take a while. It might sound scary and impossible. I felt that way, but if you take it day by day, you can start to make plans and focus on you so that things will begin to fall into place.
I haven’t written in probably over a year now. I guess I haven’t felt like there was anything I needed to get out. Sorry to the girls who have emailed me and were upset that there hasn’t been anything in a long time.
I feel like I just woke up this morning and was 24 years old and I’m supposed to start growing up and making decisions. This has made me think about high school and how I wish I had finished college when I was supposed to, 2011. I feel like it doesn’t matter how many times older people tell you that life changes so much and opens up to you after high school. It’s like you can’t blink or you’ll miss something. This has always been an issue of mine. I don’t really want to make big and scary life decisions, so I’ve made few and then I look back and realize that I should have taken a more active approach to my life. I can’t stress how much I wish I wasn’t still in college at this point though. I couldn’t make up my mind so, in default, I chose no school. I guess school isn’t for anyone. HOWEVER, if you really have no idea what you’re doing, go to school. Seriously, as long as you can.
High school is so quick and I have a handful of memories that I cherish and life experiences that have helped me grow but it ends. When high school ends, you really start to become the person you’ll be for the rest of your life. You stop trying as hard to fit into the high school scene and you realize that the world is big and there are more possibilities. So many possibilities that I still can’t really decide what I want my life to be. I’ve taken a new approach lately though, just try everything. Try new foods, new experiences, new adventures. Anything to try so that I can decide what I like and what I don’t like.
I think we focus so much on our relationships in high school. We’re worried our friends won’t like us if we do something that’s considered weird. We’re worried that boys won’t like us if we don’t dress a certain way or if we don’t want to have sex. We’re so preoccupied trying to fit in that we don’t work on being ourselves. I wanted to be liked so badly my entire life and I didn’t ever really explore the things I had an interest in because I was trying to work on my relationships with friends and boys. I forgot that I was a person with my own life. I focused my life around everyone elses. It sucks because even if you’re reading this and in high school, there’s still a huge chance that you’ll just continue on with your life and forget what you’ve read. But, if we all could just forget what everyone wanted us to be, we might be better equipped to figure out our own lives and maybe that might happen a little bit earlier in life. I think it would also increase our chances of being happy more often.
I guess my point is that you have to be you. You have to try. You have to understand that being young doesn’t last forever so enjoy it. Don’t try to be something you’re not because that is a colossal waste of time. Don’t just sit back and let others dictate your life. Experience it. Accept loss and move forward. Most of all, just do your best to make yourself happy and the rest will fall into place.
This is just a friendly, post election reminder to be kind. I think we, including myself, can get so wrapped up in the competition of it all that we forget what’s really important. If you like him, if you hate him, Obama is the president so let’s make him work for all of us. That’s what he was elected to do! Let’s take these next 4 years and come together.
No matter what side you’re on, remember that there’s a nice and mean way to get your point across. Think before you speak.
And, i’m sorry, being computerless has made blogging difficult. I promise I have posts written and waiting to go up as soon as everything gets fixed!
Juste Love :)
victoriavang asked: Oh by the way. I think juste love should also be a magazine or have the same contents. Just a thought
Well, maybe in the future, when I finish my degree in Psych!
It’s been a while and that’s no good!
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about our relationships and the time and effort put into them.
One of the hardest things that we go through can be dealing with a relationship that has ended. This becomes harder when we’re not the ones that ended it. I am one of the worst when it comes to letting go. I guess I’m what you’d call a friend hoarder.
More recently, I’ve noticed friends going through this as well. I’m 23, almost 24 and I believe this becomes even more common as I am getting older. As you change and become more involved with becoming the person you’re going to be in your adult life, you start to make stronger, deeper relationships with others. This is because you know yourself better, you can (hopefully) communicate better and you make friends with people who are interested in the same things. I have noticed though that sometimes friendships reach there limit. It becomes harder to put efforts into relationships that do not work. I am not saying you should start to hate these people but that you should focus on those who provide a positive connection and put the same amount of effort in as you do.
The other type of relationship of course would be a romantic one. This tends to be harder to let go, most of the time. We have a hard time accepting either the idea of being alone, the idea of trying to find and make a new connection with another, or we still have feelings for that person. So what can be done to get over this feeling?
I’ll admit that I still have days where I miss exes and old friends. I think when you love someone, a part of you will always love them and you will think about them from time to time. Here’s 5 reminders though to keep you sane and allow you to move forward:
1. There is no such thing as a time where you should be over someone. You’ll get over them in your own time.
2. Go pick up, “It’s called a break up cause it’s broken”. It will surprise you and it has helpful guides to aid you through a break up!
3. You need to give yourself time. You can’t be best friends after a breakup (something I’ve found hard to accept) and sometimes you can’t ever be friends. However, you can learn to accept that and with time, you’ll be okay with it.
4. You’re still alive. This means the other 6 billion people in the world have a chance to meet you. That means that out of those people, you’ll love again or make a new friend.
5. You’re an amazing person. The worst thing you can do to yourself after you’ve lost a friend or a lover is add low self esteem. Stop throwing a pity party for yourself, no one wants to come to that kind of party. If you have to, write on a paper and hang up a sign that says you’re awesome. Add to that sign all the amazing things that make you you. Eventually, you’ll realize it too.
Understand that sometimes relationships end. It happens to everyone at least once and you will get through it!
*note that the loss I’m talking about is not related to death, and that is a completely different kind of loss. I’m talking about people losing touch and making new relationships.
**if you start to realize that you pr a friend cannot get through a breakup or end of a friendship and you or your friend think you might be depressed or hurt yourself, tell someone or call the many hotlines available.
I’m really tired of how rude, ignorant and disrespectful people are lately. These are things my mother always taught me and I think, in light of mother’s day and of recent events, these are important to review.
1. Be respectful of others and their possessions.
2. If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all.
3. Angry at someone? Get them back with kindness.
4. Just because someone “hits” you, it does not give you the right to hit them back.
5. Fighting doesn’t solve anything.
6. And you don’t have to agree with everyone’s choices. But if they’re not hurting you, keep your opinions about their choice to yourself and accept that it’s not your choice to make.
Anonymous asked: i know you say everyone is beautiful exactly how they are and i agree! but the thing is that people are so superficial it makes people so self conscious. how is the bigger girl supposed to get the guy she wants if he isnt physically attracted to her? and how is the dumb guy gonna get the smart girl? it's hard to believe that everyone is actually perfect because nobody can just be themselves without others passing judgement. :/
I totally see where you’re coming from but sometimes you gotta take another approach. If the girl doesn’t get the guy because he’s not physically attracted to her it sucks. And frankly, I do believe that the right guy won’t pass by the girl whose right for him no matter what she looks like. BUT, it could be just as easy to say that the physically attractive girl could end up not getting the guy because the guy doesn’t like that girl’s personality. In high school and even college, it’s hard to see it that way because at that age, you don’t really know yourself yet. So, a lot of relationships you make there will be superficial. But I promise, it does change once you’re out in the real world. You start to make more deep and meaningful relationships. You start to see people for who they are underneath the physical layer.
People will always be attracted initially to physical beauty,BUT, I promise that inner beauty is more important. You’ll realize this as you get older.
And the “dumb” guy won’t get the “smart” girl and vice versa because they have nothing in common. You will also realize this as you get older but you make the best relationships with the people you have most in common with. So, people who don’t have anything to talk about, people who don’t have a similar thirst for knowledge, wouldn’t be well suited for each other.
I’m sorry I used the word perfect because that word is confusing. But you have the ability to make up your own definition of perfect; everyone else does. I will tell you one thing that I believe, I think everyone is perfect at being themselves. Once you let go of that “what you’re supposed to be” and just be, you are perfect. No one will ever be just like you and no one will think exactly like you. I think once you realize that, you are the most perfect. And you should try to believe that, no matter what anyone else says, because there will always be someone who is trying to get you down. So make up your own version of how you can be perfect and just do it.
And forget anyone who tells you that you’re not amazing, beautiful, smart, perfect.
You’re the most perfect you.
You’re smart, or you have the potential to be; try.
You’re capable, even if you don’t know it.
You’re interesting, no one will be exactly like you.
You’re loved, by at lease one person. And one person is enough.
You have a lot to smile about.
Juste Love yourself.